“If you don’t like who you are and where you are, don’t worry about it because you’re not stuck either with who you are or where you are. You can grow.”

Zig Ziglar

Before I stopped drinking, I had not given much thought to religion in a long time. I used to believe in God a long long time ago. Then I got into my teens and I got further and further away. When my Grandparents died, I was mad with God and pretty much put him out of my mind.

Looking back, the only times I really thought about God was when my life was out of control, which was quite often actually. I would be angry and shout at him and blame him for everything. I know for sure that I threw out a few “f” words at him too.

The last night that I drank alcohol, I was in a right mess. I was drunk, crying, angry, sad, confused. I remember sitting in the driveway crying after having a dumb argument with a good friend (who was also tipsy). I wasn’t crying because of the argument. I just could not cope with where I was at in my life. My drinking was continually out of control. I would turn angry after a few drinks, I was arguing all the time, my self confidence was on the floor. I felt truly awful. I sat in the driveway and I screamed up at the sky. ‘Why don’t you help me????!!!!’ I repeated this many times along with a bunch of other drivel before going to bed in a drunken stupor.

I woke up the next morning. That was the first day of my sobriety. It has been 2 years since then.

Something happened that night. Something in me changed. I can’t say it was my doing because it wasn’t. I had been drinking for 17 years; more than half of my life. I had tried numerous times to give up drinking, including a short stint with AA. I never had any success.

When I woke up on the first day of my sobriety, something was different about me. I knew that I could never drink again but I had absolutely no idea how I was going to be sober, live sober and, stay sober.

God heard me that night. I didn’t realize it at that time but I know it now.

I did not set out to find God. Infact, I didn’t want to be anything like any of the recovering alcoholics that I have read about. The reason I didn’t want to go to AA was because I didn’t want my life to revolve around my alcoholism and recovery. I wanted to be sober but I wanted to be normal. I certainly didn’t want to become like those recovering alcoholics who had found God. Oh No. I did not want that at all. I had an image to preserve (well a somewhat flakey one) but in my mind I had to still be kind of cool and with it and not some bible bashing do-gooder.

I am happy to tell you that it happened. I became everything I never wanted to be with one difference. I love it. I love the second part of my life. I love God. He is totally in my life and he has grown on me like I could never have imagined.

It has taken me months to write this post. There is still the part of me that can not believe this is me and every time I wanted to share my story of how I really got sober, I procrastinated. 

Religion is exciting. A relationship with God is amazing. Things are happening in my life, the answers to my prayers.

I have experienced what so many other believers already know and I can’t believe it has taken me this long.

I just want to say, that if you are sober and struggling then you might want to put your life in God’s hands and begin your own exploration of faith.

If you are interested, I recommend these three essential tools to get you started:

1) The New Living Translation Bible by Tyndale House

2) The Purpose Driven Life by Rick Warren

3) Daily Devotional by Ike Reighard and Zig Ziglar

 Amen!

In the past, I mixed with people who were drinkers. That is pretty much how it went. To be honest, I didn’t really have much in common with those who didn’t drink. Why would I? I thought they were boring. I couldn’t imagine living a life with alcohol.  Now that I don’t drink, I don’t gravitate to drinkers anymore. Why? Because they don’t interest me anymore. Even though I don’t feel like drinking anymore, I don’t think it would be a good idea to be surrounded by alcohol/alcoholics on a regular basis.

I frequently enjoy sobriety but I acknowledge the huge transformation one has to undergo in order to stay successfully sober. Sobriety is not as simple as just giving up alcohol. Your internal mechanism must change too. It can be really hard. I do truly feel like I am living a double life sometimes. There is the outside me, what I show people of myself, my reactions, what I talk about, how I act and then there is the inner me. The inner me is always trying to adapt, to catch up, to learn, to change, to conquer, to keep going. Most days I can handle it but some days it just feels like too much.

When the days catch up with me and I feel like I can’t do this anymore, I ask myself why I am doing this. Why am I staying sober? Why do I keep going? What is the point of all of this? Am I really happier now that I am sober?

Depending just how bad I feel, I may think sobriety is just not worth it and life is totally crap without the edge taken off it. But even then, I don’t reach for the bottle.

What keeps me going is the hope that life will get better. I look back and see that even though I don’t always feel like it, I have made really good progress. I am a changed person in so many ways. I experience long spells of time when I don’t just feel good, I feel great. I am growing slowly but surely and inside I feel strongly that to drink again would finish me off for good. I don’t think I could handle a relapse. I have never had one since I quit drinking and it scares the life out of me to think it could happen.

Life does get better in sobriety. In the early days, my mood was changeable by the hour, at least now I have a good few months at a time. I know that the longer I carry on, the longer the good times will last. That is why I keep going in sobriety.

I read over this post and I see my thoughts darting all over the place, that is how sobriety is in the early days. You are all over the place!

I can remember specific times when I laughed out loud about something, I surprised myself, I would feel like ‘wow, that was really funny and I haven’t even had a drink’.

Alcohol had numbed my senses to the point that I rarely laughed when sober.  Today, that couldn’t be further from the truth. I love to laugh, I laugh often about all kinds of things and with many different people. Fortunately, the longer I stayed sober, the more I laughed.

Alcohol had robbed me of the natural ability to laugh and see the humor in every day life.

Thank God for my sobriety.

I am going to pass on a quick tip that will lift your mood. If you feel depressed, tired, useless, hopeless or maybe you don’t feel that bad but you could do with some more positivity to help you think about possibilities instead of hardship, then you will find this helpful.

Before I give it to you I want to tell you why I think this helps.

As you know if you are a regular reader, I have been sober for nearly 16 months for the first time in seventeen years. Throughout these 16 months, I have gone through just about every possible feeling/thought/emotion and mood known to man. I have battled with social anxiety, panic attacks, depression, negative thinking, withdrawal from others, low self esteem and more. All of these were reasons why I drank for so long, but the alcohol exacerbated these issues for me and magnified the worst for me. Now that I am sober and I have a fairly long period of sobriety, I am able to clearly identify what I am feeling and also what triggers it for me. Thankfully, I have the kind of nature that leads me to wanting to find a better way of dealing with things. I record what I go through in a journal, I analyze the negatives and I try and find a way to combat anything that I am uncomfortable with.

Time and time again in the last 16 months, the most common problem I experience is negative thinking that leads to depression and general unhappiness, lately I have been experimenting with changing my mood when I am feeling down or anxious or negative.

Here is one sure fire way to lift your mood and begin thinking about possibilities………

Zig Ziglar

I have known about Zig Ziglar for a few years now, I recently signed up for his newsletter and read it regularly but only recently I have started paying more attention to him. I can not believe that I have not read one of his books yet. He is truly one of the most straight talking, motivating, uplifting, sensible, humorous and genuine being I have ever encountered in the world of personal development. If you already know about this man then good for you! Read and listen to anything he has ever written and said again! If you do not know about him, do yourself a favor and learn everything you can.  This doesn’t have to cost you a lot of money either.

Here are a few ways that you can listen to Zig Ziglar right now;

Go to www.Youtube.comand type in Zig Ziglar, you can watch and listen to some mini sessions of him talking and being interviewed right now for free. Listen to them all, what have you got to loose?

If you have an Iphone or Ipod or MP3 player, go to www.audible.comand download an audiobook of his. They range from $2.95 to about $15.95. They are worth every penny! If anyone knows a less expensive way then please share.

If you have a kindle or prefer reading on your pc, go to www.barnesandnoble.comand download an ebook of Zig Ziglars.

Go to www.amazon.com and buy a used book for a fraction of the price in the bookstore or go to your local library and get a book for free!

Whatever you do, listen to Zig Ziglar right now on YouTube.

Take action and do something right now. It has worked for me, it truly has.

One tip for you, once you have read or listened to something of Zig Ziglar’s, read it again, and again. Read or listen to it when you feel good and when you feel bad. Take note of what he says and take action.

Sign up for the newsletter here;

My positive commitment to living the best life ever…..

I am not depressed, I do not have stinkin thinking, I am making something of my life, I overcome hard times, I find solutions to every challenge presented to me, I learn from every experience be it good or bad, I do not allow others to bring me down, I take responsibility for my life and I find ways to help others every day.

What do you want to overcome today?

If you need inspiration for sobriety, or want to create a new life for yourself, or need some lifting up then listen to this audio interview with Tony Robbins by Brendon Burchard. I am always on the lookout for inspiration, motivation, enthusiasm for life, personal development and success. This interview gave me an enormous lift when I needed it most. I have this readily available to me my file of  Daily Inspiration. I keep a folder in my outlook which is full of emails that I receive from the people that inspire me and bring me in touch with what life is really all about. If you haven’t done this yet, it is a very proactive way of getting yourself out of any depressive funks that you may go through. I listen and read them as often as I can, I need to do better at doing that when I really don’t feel like it because they can turn your thinking around in minutes.  All of my emails from Simple Truths, My Super Charged Life, The Happiness Project, Spiritual River, Zig Ziglar’s newsletter, Spiritual Zen, Brendon Burchard, Seeds of Success, Millionaire Mommy Next Door, William Cope Moyers Column on Creators, Vivian Eisenecher’s Blog, Paul Campbell’s Column on The Irish Book Review and more.

Let me tell you, to make it in this world of sobriety you need an army of motivation to keep you going, it is not for the faint hearted I will say that. But if you want to make a difference in your life then you can do it with all of these useful tools to help. Of course, I will now be adding Tony Robbins to my army!

Let me know what you think of the interview and enjoy!

Be Sober!!!!! Get a new life!!!!

Vivian Eisenecher has written a brilliant book titled “Recovering Me, Discovering Joy”.

I have long been interested in Vivian Eisenecher’s story. When I first embarked upon my own sobriety journey, I scoured the Internet for sobriety success stories and I came across Vivian’s website many times.

I admire Vivian’s quest to help others using her own experience with alcoholism as a platform. And, as a fellow social anxiety sufferer, I was keen to learn about Vivian’s battle with social anxiety disorder (SAD).

After reading “Recovering Me, Discovering Joy” I realized that Vivian’s book is not just a story about alcoholism, social anxiety and depression. There is a much wider, universal appeal to this book. It is a true self help and personal development book that most people would glean something from.

Vivian uses personal stories, quotes and solid facts to share her journey with the reader. This is a cleverly written book that gives you hope, inspiration and a identifiable companion in each page.

“Recovering Me, Discovering Joy” just proves that there are unlimited possibilities when you embrace sobriety and tackle your problems full on. Vivian clearly leads the way using her faith and wisdom and has definitely earned her title as Recovery Queen.

Get sober, go on, do it. It is hard as hell but you know what, you get yourself back. You get your self respect back, you don’t have to feel apologetic and guilty all the time, you don’t have to look at other people and think how together they are and how superior they are because inside you feel so awful about your drinking. Reality is that once you get sober, you can be your own person, make your own decisions, spend your time with people that you truly admire and respect not those that you just have a good time with. You also realize that those people that you thought were so worthy of respect are actually just human. It is a bit of a comedown to realize that every one is just like you, just a person trying to live their life the best way they can, dealing with their own problems.

A hard part of sobriety for me is the reality that no one is perfect, everyone is human and everyone makes mistakes.

For a long time I had such low self esteem that I held so many others in a much higher regard than myself. The reality check you get once you have some solid sober time under your belt is pretty tough to accept. Obviously no one is perfect. The good news is that I was not as bad as I thought! That is rather nice to know.

I think I have always looked for perfection, as unrealistic as it is. Over the years, I  thought I had found some perfect people, it was a shock for me to realize once I got sober that actually they were no where near perfection, I had been holding them in such high regard, and why? Because I was so low in self esteem and had a brain that had been pickled by alcohol for so long.

I guess my point is that you should get sober, take a good look around you and realize that this world is a better place for having you in it. It doesn’t make you less of a person because you are an addict, it doesn’t matter if you have stooped lower than low, if you don’t like the things you have done and the journey to date, then now you have the chance to change it, as well as the people in your life. People come and go in our journey through life and I am a believer that there is something to learn from all of them even if you don’t particularly like them very much.  Don’t feel insecure about other people because none of them are any better than you even if they think they are. They have just chosen a different path.

Be your own person, make your own choices, create a life that you like and feel good about. Connect with those who stimulate you and whose company you enjoy, if there is no one around you like that then go and find them. For goodness sake, get away from people who sap your energy or just generally do not make you feel good about yourself 100% of the time.

I am honored to have interviewed Patrick Meninga of The Spiritual River Website about his sobriety journey. Lap it up people!

· How long have you been sober?

My clean date is on January first, 2001. So I have over 8 and half years of continuous sobriety now.

· How many times had you attempted sobriety before finally nailing it?

I had tried to get sober twice before. Once I went to a local rehab and my intention was to quit drinking but to keep using other drugs (man, was I naive at the time!). Of course that did not work. Then other time I went to Hazelden in Minnesota after a family intervention. I was actually in there during Christmas and when it turned Y2K. I was still pretty mixed up at that point and things did not turn out well then either. I stayed for 28 days though and it was a real opportunity for me. But it was not to be. I stayed out using for another year and then I finally got sober at the start of 2001.

· Did your friends and family try to convince you of giving up alcohol before you made the decision?

Absolutely. Even my friends that I drank and did drugs with tried to encourage me to quit. They wanted better things for me, even my drinking buddies did. I was my own worst enemy.

· Why do you think some people reach the point of complete surrender and manage to give up alcohol and others do not?

Gosh that is a tough question. I work in a treatment center, and you cannot believe how many people keep coming back after having relapsed, over and over again. It is really sad in some cases.

On the one hand, I would like to take credit and say that I am sober today because I am somehow better than those who relapse. But I understand now that this is not reality, and that I am simply blessed. I was chosen to be sober I think, because when I was still drinking, I wanted to ride a wave of drugs and alcohol ride into my early grave. That plan was just fine by me. Something….intervened. I do not know if that is the truth but it is the best explanation I have for what turned me around. That or the love of my family finally broke through to me. But I had that all along and it was never enough to make me stop self medicating, so that does not seem right either.

Nope, it was higher powered for sure.

· What do you think are the 3 most important things a newly sober person can consider to ensure that they maintain sobriety?

Well I have a personally philosophy of recovery that has some ideas in it, such as:

1) Pursue holistic and personal growth

2) Caring for self (build self esteem through action and goal setting).

3) Networking with others in recovery

But quite honestly I am still refining that philosophy as I see what works in my life and the lives of those around me.

I used to think that overwhelming force was a key component of success in recovery, because long term treatment is what finally worked for me (I lived in treatment for 20 months when I got sober). But it fails for so many people, and the success rate of long term treatment is similar to that of short term residential treatment. So my ideas change and evolve over time based on the trends that I am seeing, but also based on what has worked for me.

Addiction and recovery is so far from being “solved” that it is a really messy industry right now. Trying to help people is hard. Putting up decent success rates is even harder. No one is an expert at helping alcoholics (not if you look at their success rates they achieve!).

So I guess, to answer the question, my 3 most important things for someone are:

1) Make a decision to stop drinking at a really deep level (true surrender. Not doing it for others. No will left to chase pleasure or happiness in the bottle. No enthusiasm left in drinking).

2) Get excited about the potential of a life lived sober (find passion and purpose in recovery. Meaning. A way to connect or help others is probably vital.).

3) The first 2 things are enough. The first is giving up the drinking, and the second thing is embracing a positive life. This is all that is necessary. The rest is details (unfortunately there are a lot of them!).

· As you see it, what are the most common reasons for people failing at sobriety?

Well if you look at my answer above about what is really critical for success in recovery, you can see what will lead to failure. People fail in recovery for 2 reasons:

1) Not really surrendering to their disease (they have reservations about drinking or using later on, or they are not really “finished” with their drinking).

2) They do not embrace recovery. They do not create an awesome new life for themselves. They get bored, or angered, or frustrated, or whatever. The success in recovery comes from building up a positive new life. It is an act of creation. Those who fail to create will slide back into their old ways and end up relapsing.

· Anti-depressants? Yes or No

Well I would say that this comes down to the individual and that they should consult with their doctor. I will never fault an addict or an alcoholic for taking non-narcotic, non-addictive medications. Most anti-depressants fit that bill. Now there are some anxiety medications and some other narcotic medications that I think constitute a relapse, but again, that really should be a decision between the patient and the doctor. I say, if you need anti-depressants to have a good life, you should take them. Just my opinion of course….

· Therapy? Yes or No

Therapy is a tool. It cannot work magic on someone who has not really surrendered. I went to counselors and therapists for a while when I had not intention of quitting drinking. This was worthless. If you are in recovery and pushing to create a new life for yourself, then therapy can be huge. It depends on the person of course. Some really do well with therapy, while others can excel in recovery using other tools.

· A.A? Yes or No

Just like therapy, AA is another tool. It is one solution. But it is not the only path to recovery. Certainly it has helped many people. But the majority who try AA fail. In fact, the data from AA census data shows that 90 percent of those who try AA will leave within a year and never return. This is evidenced by the now famous “Comments on A.A.’s Triennial Surveys,” figure C-1, which represents a ton of data that spans 12 years.

So AA might very well help many people. But the AA census data shows that it is losing 90 percent of all newcomers, and that they do not return. Clearly, there is a need for alternatives. There is a need for more solutions….for other holistic approaches.

I do not claim to have all the answers, but any solution that is losing 90 percent right off the top could stand to have some fresh ideas in the field.

· In an ideal world, what does the future of alcohol recovery look like to you?

A huge question, I hope to write a book about this practically! But seriously, my vision of recovery is one of holistic health and personal growth.  It is less about the social and networking aspects of recovery that dominate the industry these days (mostly via 12 step groups) and more about personal empowerment, purposeful living, goal setting, etc. I don’t want to bash existing programs, but on the other hand, I see them doing so poorly for the vast majority of alcoholics. I think we can do better on at least a couple of different levels.

What would happen if you threw unlimited funding at the recovery industry? What kind of research would this lead to and what kind of solutions could we expect? My vision is that it goes far beyond the typical residential treatment program or even most long term recovery programs. I’m talking about a holistic approach that deals in every aspect of a person’s life. Perhaps the key will one day be some sort of unique screening, or a qualifier that will insure that those who enter recovery are more likely at the point of surrender that will get them decent results. Right now we see a thousand people come into treatment for alcoholism, and at least 950 have taken another drink within the first year. There has to be a better solution.

· How many people do you know that have quit drinking and stayed sober longer than 1 year?

(Laughs out loud for a second) That is a depressing question right there! I was in a unique position where I left residential treatment and went straight into a long term treatment center where I lived for 20 months. The place housed 12 guys and I was one of them. I probably saw about 30 different people come through there, even though it was supposed to be a 6 month to 2 year program (average stay was less than 6 months I figure).

Anyway, that was 8 years ago when I was living there, and out of those 30 or so guys, I count me and one other person who are still sober today. Heck, 4 of those guys are now dead. I went to 1 of their funerals. A lot those people continue to go in and out of rehab, in and out of long term, and so on.

I also know a handful of people in the fellowships (of AA and NA) that have multiple years clean, and they continue to frequent the meetings and they come to my treatment center where I work and bring meetings in to the residents there. So I see them and I see that it does work for some. But even some of those people have relapsed (the meeting chair people). So obviously no one is immune.

I went to lots of meetings my first year of sobriety and I could go back to the big AA club in town and find at least 20 people that I “know” who have a year sober or more. But I have been to about 5 meetings in the last 5 years, so that is not really my gig any more. I have found other avenues.

And, to be honest, most of my close friends in recovery have not done real well. Most have either died or relapsed, or both. One is still sober today (the one who stayed sober that I met in long term treatment 8 years ago).

· Do you think anyone could have done something to prevent you from going down the addiction path?

Nope. I was born an addict. I am positive of it.

I know this because I was hooked from the very first time I tried a drug. And I had been searching for addiction for a long time before I found it. I wish I had found it sooner; this may have saved me a lot of years of pain. Gotten it over with quicker.

The first time I took a drink or a drug in my life, I said out loud, literally “This is what I was meant to do. I will keep doing this until the day I die.” Of course, we all know how long the fun really lasted…..

· What do you see in your future?

Family, fun times, traveling. Starting projects in recovery. Starting a treatment center some day. Something high end, holistic, etc. Resort-like even.

But simply connecting with recovering addicts, in just about any way, is almost enough. I am pushing to do a bit more though….still finding the path. Still learning to create.

· Do you have any role models?

My family has always set a great example for me. But I look up to some big thinkers in marketing like Seth Godin and Tim Ferris who push people to try and do great things in the business world. Does this translate at all into recovery? Of course it does….on at least some level. Success, excellence, achievement…..these things can come to us in a number of different ways.

For example, I feel like my running has been significant in my recovery from addiction. Is running my whole program? Of course not. Would I recommend that a newcomer start jogging or running every day? No, that is missing the point as well. It’s not the running itself that benefits my recovery so much….it is the achievement, the push to do more, to go farther, to excel in something and build self esteem by doing so. That’s what makes a holistic approach so important….because it is both flexible and powerful. You can take a section of your life, and….enhance it. You can grow in focused ways. Deliberate ways.

Role models….could Tiger Woods teach a person how to be sober and live a life of recovery? Absolutely. If you can incorporate the same level of drive, the same positive energy in your life, what would stop you from creating the life you really want to achieve? If you can look up to your heroes and say “I want to achieve that kind of greatness,” then you have all the inspiration that you need.

Who inspires you to be the best person you can be? Who inspires you to create or do great things? This is how I define role models.

Those marketing gurus that I mentioned…..they are my inspiration for my recovery website, and for the work I do in creating more recovery connections. The goal is not to market meaningless drivel and make money for the sake of money, but to create something of meaning, live with purpose, and make a powerful connection with the world while doing so. If you read Godin or Ferris, you will see that they are both in line with these values. They are both creators, on almost every level.

· Do you regret your alcoholism?

No. Not at all. If I had not gone through it, I would probably have to go through it later. Better to have learned this difficult lesson already than to have to face it later on.

But even beyond that, alcoholism was a growth experience for me. It broke me down to a level where I could really abandon my “self” and slowly start to reconnect with a higher power in a new way. I discarded some old ideas that did not work for me and started exploring new beliefs, new mindsets, and a new spirituality. I actually read the New Testament since I got sober (something I had never done before). I also read quite a few books on Taoism and Zen Buddhism. I am not a bible thumper, but I have found a path that works for me. And, I would not be on this spiritual path without my alcoholism.

· Why do you think alcoholics should get sober knowing that the success rate is so low and the journey is so difficult?

The success rates in recovery really are poor, but anyone can have recovery if they really want it. I know that sounds cliche, but seriously, anyone has the capability to achieve the creative life in recovery if they really want it. We can all focus. Any alcoholic can focus. I know they can because I used to do so with raw determination, even when I was drunk. Heck, because I was drunk. The drive, the passion, the ability to focus is there. I think it is there for everyone. Any alcoholic can potentially achieve this high level of focus and use it to create a positive life without drinking. It can happen. I know it does not happen in most cases, but the potential exists there for people. For anyone.

The thing is, they have to really want it, and put in the leg work to get there. Lots of focus. Overwhelming force. Dedication. Whatever they do to stay sober, they have to do a lot of it. For a long time. And keep doing stuff to actively stay sober. It is a long, hard, challenging road. Lots of focus.

But anyone can do this stuff. Anyone can create a life of recovery. Because there are so many paths to take. So many passions that can fuel the creative life. You don’t have to be a website author and an avid runner. Heck, you can be all about meditation and archery for all I care. Or you can volunteer at the soup kitchen and rescue abandoned cats or something. It doesn’t matter.  It’s not the stuff you do, it’s the passion you do it with.  Find your passion and start living with purpose. Find a way to help people in a way that is meaningful to you and run with it. This is the creative life. This is the path to a recovery that works and grows.

· What are your favorite books?

Well of course you have the marketing gurus I talked about above, Seth Godin and Tim Ferris. They are both bestselling authors, but they also have blogs that I follow. I have read a lot of mainstream fiction too, and a lot of books about spirituality and so on. I like reading (and writing) in general.

But my favorite books are those that have great ideas in them. Things that can spark new creation, new action. I guess that is why I am drawn to fresh, award-winning bestsellers, written by the best marketers in the world.

· What do you do for fun?

Work directly with clients in a treatment center full time (sort of fun, sort of crazy!).

Play golf. (a growing passion. In nice weather on the right course, walking a nine is like a moving meditation almost….)

Spend time with family (playing with my niece and nephew is a blast!)

Run. (I used to hate running, like normal people.)

Create stuff. (Mostly stuff in the online world…especially connections with others in recovery and new ideas about recovery).

To see more ideas about non traditional recovery, visit The Spiritual River.

I just came across this. What an inspiration to all of us who are overcoming alcohol and drug addictions. The 20th anniversary of National Alcohol and Drug addiction month is coming up in September 2009 and you can join in by participating in the Recovery Rally.

See below for details:

On Saturday, September 12th join thousands in NYC to celebrate the 20th anniversary of National Alcohol and Drug Addiction Recovery Month. Together, we can raise national awareness that addiction is a treatable disease, and recovery is possible!

What is the Recovery Rally?

A FREE public event to celebrate people in recovery and pay tribute to those who support them.

The rally features a walk over the Brooklyn Bridge to reinforce the message that anyone can cross their own bridge to recovery.

The celebration begins in Foley Square with live entertainment, guest speakers and celebrity appearances!

Where does the event start?

Check-in at Foley Square in downtown Manhattan. Come early for pre-walk activities including a warm-up, musical performance and special guest speakers

When should I arrive?

Please plan on arriving at Foley Square by 8:30 AM to check-in. On-site registration will remain open until 9:00 AM.

How do I get to the Recovery Rally?

Public transportation makes it easy to get to Foley Square.

From New York City, you can get to the rally by subway, bus, or LIRR.

• Subway – Take the 4, 5, or 6 line to Brooklyn Bridge-City Hall.
  Take the 1, 2,3, J, M, or Z line to Chambers Street.
  Take the R or W line to City Hall.
• Bus – Take the M1, M6, M15, M22, M103, or the B51 to City Hall.
• LIRR – Take the LIRR to 34th St. Penn Station. Transfer to the A Train Downtown and get off at Chambers St.

If you’re driving to Foley Square, please see the directions below. Click here for a list of available parking garages nearby. You can also use Mapquest by simply typing in the intersection of Duane Street, Lafayette Street, Centre Street and Pearl Street.

Click here for full info

Since I quit drinking alcohol and began living a sober life, I have done a lot of reading. I started this post thinking that I would share some of the interesting reads that I have come across this week. Then it struck me just how much of this past year I have devoted to reading material mainly about sobriety, alcoholism, recovery, addiction, mental health, self growth, personal development, achievement and success.
Most of what I have absorbed this past year has been about the above topics mainly because it had to be. I needed to immerse myself in overcoming addiction and living a sober life. If I had not invested my time doing this, my sobriety journey would have ended in failure a long time ago.
Reading, taking action, journal writing, and exercising, receiving support from family and friends, therapy and writing Recovery Princess has got me to where I am today. Nearly a year sober!
I should tell you that there has been anger, tears, frustration, pain, sadness, fear and anxiety. All of which have tried to lure me back to the bottle, but I do firmly believe that everything I have filled my mind with has been paying off and has kept me sober.
Here are some recent reads that I have come across that you might find useful:
Creators.com - I have signed up to receive two daily alerts from Zig Ziglar (Lifestyle and inspirational writer) and William Moyers (Beyond addiction). There are many other writers covering all aspects of life but these are the two that I really enjoy and get something out of.
Simpletruths.com – I signed up to receive regular newsletters from here. They are amazing and very uplifting. Also, when you go to the website, click on “view our Inspirational Movies” and watch all the short movies that they have. They each convey a meaningful message that we often forget about in our daily lives. The ones I really enjoyed were “The Race” and “Walk The Talk” my husband enjoyed “A Peacock in the land of penguins”. There is something for everyone on there and it is well worth a few minutes of your time. The website sells each of the movies, books and cd’s but it doesn’t cost you anything to watch them and receive the newsletter.

Whilst reading a post “Three Quick Tips for Getting Ahead in Life”  from “My Super Charged Life”, I came across an interesting blog article titled “Someone Just threw a shoe at you” and it helped me put some things in perspective. I like the authors style of writing and it made perfect sense. So I would go over and sign up for daily updates from both “My Super Charged Life” and “The Fluent Self” -

Here is an updated list of sobriety, personal development and motivational books that I have either read or have on my ‘To Read’ list. You might find some of these useful:

• Psycho-Cybernetics by Maxwell Maltz, Ph.D – To change your view of yourself
• You can heal your life by Louise Hay
• Zero limits-  Joe Vitale
• A complaint free world, How to stop complaining and start enjoying the life you always wanted by Will Bowen
• Stages of life – Carl Jung
• Women who think too much
• Turnabout by Jean Kirkpatrick
• Passages by Gail Sheey
• Goodbye hangovers Hello Life by Jean Kirkpatrick
• On the road to sell recovery by Jean Kirkpatrick
• A fresh Start by Jean Kirkpatrick
• Self-Reliance by Ralph Waldo Emerson
• Wishcraft: How to get what you really want by Barbara Sher
• Steven Covey Books
  

Don’t forget to download your free copy of “Addiction Help Guide“by Patrick Meninga of Spiritual River. Just click on the image in the left column and save to your pc.

Please share any books or resources that have helped you.

I am looking for some writers to contribute to Recovery Princess. The type of writing should be inspirational and motivational and of course unique.
I think that anyone contemplating sobriety or anyone who has had some success with sobriety after abusing alcohol for a prolonged period of time would fit nicely with Recovery Princess.
Recovery Princess is primarily my sharing of the sobriety journey that I am on. I now include relevant articles that I come across in the press and I have added some personal insights as I go along.
I have come to realize that there are many people out there who are on the verge of giving up drinking alcohol, they are searching for information, inspiration and motivation to give them the push they need to quit drinking alcohol for good. This is why I think that more positive writing from personal experience may be helpful to others.
It could also work if you are currently drinking and want to stop but there are things holding you back, sharing your experience will be helpful too.
So, if you think you have something to share and this might be a good fit for you then please leave me a comment below. Or email me at madison @ recoveryprincess.com

Thanks!

Life really is good without alcohol.

Life is good. I feel like I am waking up from a really long dream. It seems unreal that I actually lived that way for so long. It is a strange but liberating feeling. I am finally free from the crap of alcoholism.

Sobriety will have its challenging days, I know that for sure but I will take sobriety over using alcohol to numb my every feeling any day.

I never thought I would see the day that I could write something like this and honestly mean it. I am glad to be where I am right now.

Source; CNN by Madison Park

When rehab and Alcoholics Anonymous meetings didn’t work for Eddie Freas, he sought another way to kick his 20-year drug and alcohol addiction.

He swam 2.4 miles. He biked 112 miles. He ran 26.2 miles. The Pennsville, New Jersey, resident found relief in triathlons.

“I feel better when I’m working out,” said Freas, 33. “It does wonders for the mind. The reason I started running — it was a switch that went off in my head. I started feeling positive and feeling great about myself.”

Freas spent his youth in pursuit of drugs. At the age of 13, he snuck bottles of Amaretto and rum from his mother’s liquor cabinet. He also developed a taste for marijuana and cocaine. By his senior year of high school, Freas was kicked off the wrestling and football teams after failing a drug test.

Then in 2007, after a three-day binge, “I came home and was crying,” Freas said. “I was so depressed. I turned on the TV.” The set was tuned to ESPN, which was airing a story about a former drug addict who competed in triathlons.

The program’s subject was Todd Crandell, who had lost a college hockey scholarship because of a drug addiction. After 13 years of using drugs, Crandell started competing in Ironman races and championed finding positive ways to fight addiction through his program called Racing for Recovery.

Having an athletic background, I was drawn to getting back in shape,” Crandell said. “It makes you turn intellectually and spiritually fit. Exercise is essential. It decreases addiction, depression and you use it as part of the recovery.”

Freas was entranced by the parallels.

“His whole story seemed like mine,” Freas said. “That’s why it hit me so much. It was my story but it happened to somebody else. I knew I had to get back into fitness.”

He took a bus to Racing for Recovery’s office in Sylvania, Ohio. There, Freas said he learned to “stay clean and use other things — fitness, instead of drugs.” On his first day, Freas pushed himself to run 10 miles.

“It killed me,” Freas said. “I was just motivated. I was sore for a week and I gradually got into it. As soon as I started including fitness into my everyday lifestyle, it made it so much easier. It kept me busy and because of the physical fitness, it was making me feel better about myself.”

He pushed himself to run farther and raced in his first Ironman competition in 2008.

“It’s different when you use drugs, you temporarily feel good and afterwards, you feel like doing more drugs,” Freas said. “When you go for a long run and do physical fitness, you feel good doing it.”

Research in animals and humans show that exercise can be a mild antidepressant.

“It isn’t a huge surprise when you consider many positive effects exercise can have with regards to the brain chemistry: dopamine, serotonin, endorphin, epinephrine — these are all associated with mood altering effects,” said Dr. Cedric Bryant, the chief science officer for the American Council on Exercise. “If they’re able to get this natural high, through a natural endeavor such as exercise, it allows them to replace the means to achieve that high with a more positive approach.”

One study showed that women trying to quit smoking were more successful when they exercised. And the National Institute on Drug Abuse held a conference last year to explore the possible role of physical activity in substance abuse prevention.

“The thought centers around the release of mood-altering brain chemical, mainly endorphins,” Bryant said. “It gives you euphoria or what you call ‘runner’s high.’ ”

Crandell said some people who battle drug addiction “want something more than sitting in support groups filled with smoke, complaining about drinking.”

“I’ve had some of my naysayers from other programs who say you’ve taken one addiction and replaced it for another,” Crandell said. “I’ve taken addiction and put into a new focus that includes exercise. Exercise for me is essential to my recovery and well-being.”

The purpose of Racing for Recovery is not to turn everyone into an athlete, but to focus on positive pursuits in a person’s life.

“Whatever you lost during your addiction, that should be your Ironman, not just running,” Crandell said. “If your goal is to become a teacher, let that be your Ironman.”

Click here for full article

Have the will to be successfully sober!

“The difference between the successful person and others is not a lack of strength, not a lack of knowledge, but rather a lack of will”

Vince Lombardi

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After giving up drinking alcohol and approaching my first year of sobriety, I often wonder if it has been worth it and if I have really changed for the better. For the most part, sobriety has been a real eye opener and an amazing journey of self discovery. It has felt so good not to experience the many negative thoughts, feelings and consequences associated with abusing alcohol. But, there have also been many extremely difficult times when I have felt so depressed, unhappy and hopeless. Fortunately, the low times have not outweighed the high times of my sobriety. During sobriety, this is not something that you think of often, which is why I was pleasantly surprised when I read an article ‘Be Kind, Please Rewind: Reflections From A Year Ago‘ from ‘My Supercharged Life’. 

This time last year;

I was in a constant state of panic and anxiety fuelled by alcohol consumption and hangovers
My every move was dictated by whether or not I would be able to drink alcohol
I argued with my spouse on a daily basis about random unimportant issues
I had no self control
I was depressed
I was angry
I was lost
I could not envision the future
Getting out of bed was a huge effort
I was totally self absorbed

This list could go on and on, I was really in a bad place. Alcohol had really reduced me to a miserable wreck. So, after reading through this fabulous post, I reflected on just how far I have come and how much better my life is right now.

Now;

In the course of the year, the panic and anxiety I experience is on occasion, NOT daily
I no longer rely on alcohol in order to function. I lead a busy but fulfilling daily life that I enjoy
The few arguments that I have with my spouse now are ‘normal’. They do not turn into the nonsensical, loud and over the top arguments that used to escalate�
I have self control - I have given up alcohol, cigarettes, self pity
I am no longer depressed, I have some moments but nothing like a year ago.
I have let go of the anger
I know who I am now and where I am headed
There is not enough hours in the day for me to do all the things I want to do
I am able to be a support for those around me when they need it

Part of my motivation comes from reading articles such as this. My Super Charged Life authored by Jeff Nickles is one of my favorite reading spots, I recommend it highly for some much needed motivation. 

Have you reached a year of sobriety? What are your reflections?

Ever since I quit drinking alcohol, I have really enjoyed sobriety quotes and affirmations. I wouldn’t say that they change everything in your world but they sure can help to give you perspective, pick you up when you feel down or challenge you to try and live a little differently and for the better.

I have many quotes that I look at from time to time and I collect them as I find them.

Today I came across this one from Zig Ziglar;

“Discipline yourself to do the things you need to do when you need to do them, and the day will come when you will be able to do the things you want to do when you want to do them!”

Do you have any favorite alcohol recovery or sobriety quotes? Please share them in the comments

I am so excited to announce that I have a free eBook about Alcohol, Drug Addiction and Creative Recovery for you to download. This book was written by a friend of mine, Patrick Meninga who authors the Spiritual River website about Overcoming Alcohol and Drug Addiction.

This book covers;

* The 2 stages of recovery and how your strategy should differ for each stage

* The transition to long term sobriety

* Typical mistakes that are made in early recovery

* Going beyond group therapy as a solution

* Finding a framework for creative recovery

* Creating with action in your life

* Using gratitude and continuous learning as tools for recovery

* What comes next after achieving the creative life in recovery

* Helping others with recovery 

If you have a drinking problem or if you know someone who does, please share this book with them.

I hope you enjoy the book!

Free eBook about Alcohol and Addiction

Subscribe to Recovery Princess by Email

I just came across another sobriety book that tells the story about overcoming alcoholism and drug abuse.
(TheManOverboard-Book.com)
The Man Overboard is the dramatic story of Darryl Hagar, a Merchant Marine Officer who within his life of discipline and order led a secret, clandestine existence of alcoholism, drug abuse, chaos, and crime. In The Man Overboard, Darryl retells his gripping personal account of his struggle to reclaim control of his life and begin the journey toward recovery from a lifestyle no one even knew existed……
Click here to read more about Daryl Hagar and directly to the website which promotes his book about overcoming alcoholism and drug abuse.

First you quit drinking, and then you need to stay sober. Here are 18 ways to help you stay sober.

1. Walk and exercise daily
2. Write in a journal frequently, read Journal Writing To Stay Sober
3. Confide in your family and friends. Tell them you want to stay sober and you need their help
4. Join a support group such as Alcoholics Anonymous or Women For Sobriety, join the online forums too
5. Read sobriety books
6. Read inspirational websites and blogs about subjects that interest you
7. Read personal development books
8. Plan your day by using a schedule
9. Set 3 daily goals and achieve them
10. Get organized and clear out the clutter
11. Stay away from the people and places that tempt you to drink alcohol
12. Identify your triggers
13. Write a goodbye letter to alcohol
14. Write ‘Morning Pages‘
15. Write 3 things that you are grateful for every day
16. Create a life list, read ‘Create a Life List’  and visit My Life List
17. Start a blog
18. Get a therapist

All of these methods have helped me to stay sober. I hope you find them useful too.

When I first began writing in Recovery Princess, two of my first posts were about the advantages of being sober and 45 things you learn in the first 90 days of sobriety.

In the beginning of sobriety, almost immediately, you begin to notice the positive side of what sobriety brings to your life.

Throughout these early days, it is the small benefits that a newly sober person gets excited about. Waking up without a hangover for a whole week seems enough at times to make you want to jump out of bed and shout “Wow, this is great! I feel like a new person!”

As the months go by, there are other benefits of being sober which is why I wanted to write an updated post.

• You notice that your mind seems clearer
• You begin to think about new possibilities
• The first seedlings of hope begin to sprout
• You become more organized
• You feel like you are on the right path to find real purpose and meaning
• Life becomes a journey
• People admire you and ask for your advice about how to get sober
• Another benefit of being sober is that your problem solving ability returns. As opposed to turning to alcohol for strength or to help you deal with your problem, you are forced to rely on your natural ability to problem solve. This is huge! It is definitely tough the first few times but once you experience making it through a few of your problems without reaching for a drink, your confidence begins to restore, slowly but surely. You learn to face life’s situations and work through them using all that you have within you.
• You begin to explore who you really are. Everything changes when you get sober. Being sober is truly a discovery of who you really are. Alcohol accentuates, creates and enhances aspects of your personality that are otherwise not present. In other words, you do, say and act differently when under the influence of alcohol. So when you quit alcohol, you will start to notice that are things that you do not enjoy as much as you used to. Your interests will start to change. This is because you are coming closer to who you really are, the natural you, the one without alcohol.
• You start to create. Being sober for a period of time will lead you to do one of two things. You will either get very depressed and unable to accept this dramatic change to your lifestyle, which will lead you back to alcohol. Or, you will begin to create. A must read on this subject is the creative theory of recovery explained. In my opinion, creation is the only successful route to take. When you create something and get in touch with your creative side, you will begin to feel passion and purpose, this is essential in your sobriety.  At this time in my life, Recovery Princess is my creative outlet. It allows me to delve into my journey through sobriety, express myself, help and inspire others. Writing and doing research for Recovery Princess has been a huge benefit of being sober because is allowing me to explore my creative side. This of course is just one aspect of creation. What you create is entirely up to you. Do something different, try to figure out what you enjoy and do more of it. Read about subjects that interest you, work on creating a different lifestyle. The more you do this, the more of a good habit it will become. You will soon find that creation is a benefit of sobriety.

What benefits of sobriety have you experienced? Do you think there are any benefits to sobriety? Tell us what you think in the comments.

Thank you for visiting “Recovery Princess; Quit Drinking and Enjoy Sobriety”

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If you have arrived at this website, then you probably want know how to stop drinking alcohol. You most certainly will have questions and you are looking for answers. These questions may be for yourself or you may want to know how to help someone else stop drinking alcohol.

In my case, I asked the question for myself and I searched for the answer for many many years.

Over the years, I have tried all kinds of ways to stop drinking. Here is a list of what I have tried, you may recognize that you have tried some of these too:

• Alcoholics Anonymous
• Willpower
• Determination
• Social drinking only
• Alcohol moderation
• Drinking half glasses of wine as opposed to full, one bottle of beer only, half a bottle of wine
• Choosing drinks with a low alcohol content
• Scheduled drinking times, only drink after 6pm or only drink on weekends
• I have sworn on my life that I would not drink alcohol
• I have prayed for help to stop drinking alcohol
• I have read books about how to stop drinking alcohol
• I have said affirmations and the serenity prayer daily for months

I can honestly say that I tried to moderate and control my drinking for years.  Nothing worked. I was pretty much a hopeless alcoholic for half of my life. (A high functioning alcoholic… yes, I even had different names for myself).

I think that the true answer to the question of “How do I stop drinking alcohol?” is to never give up trying to stop drinking alcohol. Never stop believing or thinking that you can stop drinking alcohol. If you decide that it is impossible to quit drinking then it will be. If you keep working towards living a clean and sober life then you may just find yourself sober one day.

What I am trying to get at is that you should never give up the idea that someday it is possible to achieve and maintain sobriety.  Never give up hope.  Sometimes it takes a lot of failure before you succeed. You must plant the seed of sobriety so that when you do find the courage to stop drinking, you are already mentally prepared.

Whatever your history of alcohol and no matter how many times you have attempted to give up and have failed. Keep trying.

There are no huge words of wisdom or magic answers here, but I can tell you what worked for me and that was continually trying to stop drinking alcohol. I never gave up having hope in myself.

The fact that I had attempted to quit drinking and failed so many times was actually a good thing. It was those failed attempts that finally helped me to realize that once I stopped drinking alcohol, this time, there was no going back. I had completely lost the ability to exercise control over my alcohol consumption. None of my methods of control worked. I guess if I had not tried so hard to stop drinking alcohol in the past, then I would not be where I am today. Which is completely sober.

Learn as much as you can about sobriety, gather your tools and resources and then dig deep for the courage to get started.

Recovery Princess offers many resources to help you on your journey. I hope you find it useful.

Thank you for visiting “Recovery Princess; Quit Drinking and Enjoy Sobriety”

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Women For Sobriety (WFS)

A friend of mine came across Women For Sobriety while doing some research. It is amazing an program for women alcoholics who want to stop drinking alcohol. There is a wealth of useful information about the treatment of alcoholism in women that you will find useful, I have summarized what Women For Sobriety is all about.

Women For Sobriety is a non profit organization founded by Jean Kirkpatrick back in the 1970’s.  As the name hints, it was created for women alcoholics who want to overcome alcoholism and other addictions.

Jean Kirkpatrick was an alcoholic who got sober and then turned her sobriety method into a worldwide self help program for women alcoholics.

Women For Sobriety – The New Life Program for Women Alcoholics

The ‘New Life’ program was created by Jean Kirkpatrick and consists of thirteen statements of positivity which encourage emotional and spiritual growth.

The ‘New Life’ program is used in small self help groups, hospitals, clinics and other alcohol related recovery centers.

Women for Sobriety is aimed at women because they determined that the psychological/emotional needs for women are very different in recovery than those of men.

The New Life program can be used independently or at the same time as Alcoholics Anonymous or any other alcohol recovery programs.

The thirteen statements of the Women For Sobriety New Life Program:

1. I have a life threatening problem that once had me
I now take charge of my life, I accept the responsibility

2. Negative thoughts destroy only myself
My first conscious act must be to remove negativity from my life

3. Happiness is a habit I will develop
Happiness is created, not waited for

4. Problems bother me only to the degree I permit them to
I now better understand my problems and do not permit problems to overwhelm me.

5. I am what I think
I am a capable, competent, caring, compassionate woman

6. Life can be ordinary or it can be great
Greatness is mine by a conscious effort

7. Love can change the course of my world
Caring becomes all important

8. The fundamental object of life is emotional and spiritual growth
Daily I put my life in proper order, knowing which are the priorities

9. The past is gone forever
No longer will I be victimized by the past, I am a new person

10. All love given returns
I will learn to know that others love me

11. Enthusiasm is my daily exercise
I treasure all moments of my new life

12. I am a competent woman and have much to give life
This is what I am and I shall know it always

13. I am responsible for myself and my actions
I am in charge of  my mind, my thoughts, and my life

According to Women For Sobriety, to make the program effective for you, arise each morning fifteen minutes earlier than usual and go over the Thirteen affirmations. Then begin to think about each one by itself. Take one statement and use it consciously all day. At the end of the day review the use of it and what effects it had that day for you and your actions.

Just writing those affirmations felt good!

There are also a bunch of great articles written by Jean Kirkpatrick as well as some books. I will list the links for the articles below.

The Program
Getting Back To The Real World
Meditation
Roadmaps For Your Life
Self Esteem
Sobriety Or Recovery
The Hungering Heart
The Way It Is
Understanding Relapse
Wanting To Belong

Click for information on the Women For Sobriety Annual Conference 2009

Click for the Women For Sobriety Online Community Forum

Click here to see available books, programs etc to purchase 

For more indepth information about Women For Sobriety, you can visit their website at www.womenforsobriety.org

Women For Sobriety really deals with the issues that women face everyday when suffering with alcoholism. This program aids women in learning how to quit drinking by using affirmations as well as helping women to cope whilst living with sobriety.

Enjoy the information.

Feel free to share you own knowledge of WFS and if the program works for you.

Life is full of so much that we have yet to discover, life is ours to create what we want. We can obtain it, through our thoughts and visions and our definite actions, there really are no limits other than the ones that we create in our own mind. Yes bad things happen and they can change our everyday lives but drinking our way to oblivion and numbing our true feelings will not make anything better. By using our awareness, creation and by taking action we can change our own lives. Many of us live in fear of what others think of us, of what will happen in the future, of the mistakes we made in the past and whether we match up to our neighbors and peers. I am not saying that this is wrong because it is the product of living in today’s society, but using alcohol to help get us through the day is no way of living our lives. We deserve more from life and it is possible to get more. Giving up alcohol is not the end of the world by far and unless you quit alcohol you will never know what you are truly capable of. But when you do decide to choose sobriety, don’t ’shrivel up and die’ (a quote from Patrick Meninga at Spiritual River) instead, create a rich and fulfilling life for yourself, the one that you were really intended for.

To do this, you need to make a choice and decide what you want from life. You may need to re-evaluate your friends and even your family members to see if they align with the kind of life you want to create.  The ideal situation is that you have friends and family who are going to back your decision to change your life for the better but in reality that may not be the case. It will be up to you to change the nature of your relationships. It won’t be easy but it will be worth it, try looking at the bigger picture and slowly work towards it.

Thank you for visiting “Recovery Princess; Quit Drinking and Enjoy Sobriety”

If you have stumbled across this website, I would appreciate it if you could stay a few minutes longer and share your story of success in sobriety.

I think that everyone who makes the leap into sobriety after a prolonged period of alcohol abuse or alcoholism appreciates hearing someones success story. I know that I certainly do.

When I first made the decision to quit drinking I wanted to find out as much as I could about people who have successfully given up alcohol. I believe that hearing real people tell their success stories is a great way to inspire and encourage us throughout the journey of sobriety.

Here are some tips for what to include when you share your story on Recovery Princess:

1. How long had you been drinking?
2. Why did you finally take the plunge and quit drinking?
3. What was/is the hardest part of sobriety for you?
4. How did/do you get through the hardest times in sobriety?
5. What is your one piece of advice to others contemplating sobriety?
6. How long have you been sober?
7. What have you achieved in your sobriety that you are proud of?

You take it from here!

I would love to hear your suggestions for enhancing this project, feel free to leave your ideas.

Thank you for visiting “Recovery Princess; Quit Drinking and Enjoy Sobriety”

Writing in a journal can be your savior. Putting your words on paper to describe how you feel is a powerful way of releasing pent up feelings. It is no substitute for therapy or treatment but it is effective, cheap and easy to do.

Writing in a journal can be done no matter what frame of mind you are in. In my personal experience, I have found that I tend to write more when I am going through a difficult time. I also make a conscious effort to write when I am feeling good so that I can read over these entries at future dates. The important thing to keep in mind is that there is no right or wrong way, all you have to do is start writing. Don’t think too much about how it sounds or if it makes sense, just write until you can write no more.
Photo by Adrian Clark

You may be pleasantly surprised by how differently you feel once you have finished writing.

There were many times, especially during the first few months of getting sober that I felt extremely frustrated and angry about not being able to drink ‘normally’ like others could. In these times, I found writing in a journal very helpful. Since then and up until today, I still use my journal to help me process and release the many thoughts, feelings and emotions that I experience while living a sober life.  

Benefits of writing in a journal that are worth considering:

• No judgement
• Great tool for self reflection that gives you the ability to reflect on issues
• Charts your progress and offers insights as to why you use alcohol
• Records your daily experiences and personal thoughts
• Use it as a platform for achieving your goals
• Identifies the negative patterns and habits that are bringing conflicts into your life
• Helps you to confront your issues
• Gives you a better understanding of yourself
• Inexpensive
• After a few years of journal writing, you could have the makings of a great book

Tips for journal writing:

• Use whatever writing platform you are most comfortable using, it could be a writing pad, a fancy journal or a document on your pc
• Write as often as you can, by writing daily you will get into the habit of it
• Read over past entries every so often. It is interesting to see how you progress over time
• Date each entry
• Don’t think too much about what you are writing. Just write whatever it is on your mind at that particular time
• Be honest
• Keep your journal private
• Find your own writing rhythm

Recommended reading:

A New Day A New Life by William Cope Meyers

“A journal is a constant friend that accepts our negative and positive feelings unconditionally. It is also a place where can chart our growth, inch by inch, step by step, by William Cope Meyers.

Thank you for visiting “Recovery Princess; Quit Drinking and Enjoy Sobriety”

 One of the questions you might find yourself asking when you quit drinking is ‘Who am I?’ In fact, at times it can feel like you have strayed so far from your natural self you are left clueless. 

Creating a ‘Life List’ is an easy, fun and interesting way of rediscovering who you are again.  It also serves as a great reminder for many things that you enjoy and can be used frequently for a variety of reasons that will reveal themselves to you over time.

Here is a brief outline of how to create you own.

Create a new word document or use a journal, I use a word document that I simply titled ‘List’. It is now 66 pages long and I add to it almost daily.

Begin by writing the following headings, use one page at least for each heading

‘Goals’

Start by writing down as many goals as you can. Don’t think too much about them, just write whatever comes into your mind. Write them as though they are already true. Use ‘I am’ as opposed to ‘I want’.

Here is what I began with:

• I am healthy, I am free from alcohol and nicotine
• I am in good physical health
• I have a job that I absolutely love
• I can look anyone in the eyes and not feel inferior

‘Gratitude List’

Write down everything that you are grateful for:

My examples:

• I am grateful for sunny days
• I am grateful that I am physically healthy
• I am grateful for my family
• I am grateful that I have the courage to try and change my life for the better

The following are headings for you to use as examples. As and when something comes into your mind, simply write it down in your life list under the appropriate heading. It is amazing how much you learn about yourself by doing this. It is also fun to look back at what you wrote in the beginning and be able to watch your progress.

‘Special Moments’

If you have children, this is a great place to write down some of the special moments that occur between you. Remember to date every entry.

‘Good Websites’

‘My Music’

‘Subjects to read and find out about’

‘Good Quotes’

‘Who do I admire’

‘Things that make me happy’

‘Gift Ideas’

‘Ideas for my home and garden’

‘Pampering for me’

‘Things to do and places to go’

‘Books to read and recommend’

‘Dinner Ideas’

‘Recipes and entertaining ideas’

‘Weekly Goals’

‘Career and Education ideas – What do I truly want to do?’

‘My Life 10 years from now’

This can be quite hard to begin with, you really need to stretch your imagination and create the life that you want firstly in your mind, then on paper. I used the time I spent running one day to focus on thinking about what I wanted my life to look like 10 years from now. Once you get into it you can have alot of fun creating the ideal life for yourself.

‘Where do I want to travel’

‘What were my childhood dreams’

‘Ideas’

If you commit to doing this, over time you will have create a rich story about who you are and who you are becoming.

Why don’t you give it a try and see what you discover about yourself?

I would love to hear any feedback if you do try your own ‘Life List’

Thank you for visiting “Recovery Princess; Quit Drinking and Enjoy Sobriety”

Stop drinking because –

It has stopped being fun.

You don’t want to stop drinking once you have started

You want to smoke or smoke more when you are drinking

You don’t want to go anywhere that you will not be able to drink

It makes you lazy

It mades you rude

It makes you selfish

It makes you boring

It controls you

It makes you anxious

It makes you do and say things that you would never normally do and say

It is one of the first things you think about when you wake up

Can you identify with this list?  There are tons more negative aspects and reasons for giving up alcohol, these are just the tip of the iceberg.

Are you thinking of giving up drinking? Why not try writing a list of reasons and see if it gives you the push that you need?  Have you stopped drinking? What were your reasons?

  Today I mused over the advantages of being sober. Here are some that are meaningful to me and possibly of interest to you: 

1.   No more hangovers

2.   Less time wasted – I have always been an active person but while I was drinking there was a definite cut off time when I would go from being active to a slug. The cut off time was the second I took the first sip of alcohol.

3.   90% less anxiety – It is rare that I suffer with any kind of social anxiety or panic attacks anymore.

4.   I can go anywhere, anytime. – I couldn’t just drive to the store at 8pm if I had been drinking, or take the kids out for an unexpected treat.

5.   I don’t have to plan my day around my drinking – I feel so free now.

6.   No guilt

7.   My sense of humor has come back

8.   I am happier

9.   I wake up early

10.   I don’t forget anything

Just writing this list is a benefit of being sober. I highly recommend it.

Please feel free to share your own advantages of being sober.

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